daftlypunk:

i hit my coworkers shoulder lightly and he was like “you’re going to make me cry like a girl” and i was like “what’s wrong with being a girl?” and he was quiet for a moment then he looked into the distance and whispered “the social standards they’re forced to live by”

riseoftheguardian:

i honestly can’t even hear the words “tri-state area” without thinking of phineas & ferb

my-h-e-a-r-t-s-not-in-it:

hey sorry im late i didnt want to come

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thepeoplesrecord:

"I’d like to raise both of my middle fingers to him and anyone who thinks profanity is somehow more harmful to our children than images of violence and misogyny." - Happy birthday, M.I.A.!
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tarynel:

tppdiaries:

fawnbabe:

If he doesn’t care about your orgasm, he doesn’t care about you

i. live. by. this. law. 

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want some head